Making Sure That Big, Important Rush Project Gets Done Poorly

It's easier than you may think!

(An excerpt from Stet Again!)

When you're in charge of a publications project, your entire attention and energy should be focused on making it as difficult as possible for the players on your team to accomplish their mission. Here is a distillation of my 15 years of experience in impeding the production process.

• Don't make a plan. After all, if you take the time to figure out all the steps involved, the order in which they should be done, and how long they're going to take, you might be able to anticipate potential problems and have the staff available to complete the project on time.
• Don't write a schedule. Instead, continually rant about how difficult the final deadline will be to meet, thus increasing the anxiety level while ensuring that nothing can be done to relieve the tension. An important part of this strategy is to see to it that team members have no idea ahead of time what might be expected of them or when. When you give someone a task, don't give a real deadline — just say ASAP.
• Micromanage design. If the project requires creative design work, be sure to require a justification and explanation of each layout detail, type choice, and color specification every step of the way; don't evaluate design in terms of overall effectiveness. The degree to which you employ this strategy should be in inverse proportion to your understanding of the craft of design — the less you know, the more you pick!
• Change the task several times. Preferably, adjust the specs with each review cycle. The best way to accomplish this is not to tell anyone what you expect to be done or how you expect them to do it — until they've gone ahead and done it another way. Another good strategy is to rewrite text during the production process; this can be employed at any stage, but increases in effectiveness the later it is used. The very best time is after your job has gone to the printer — at blueline or (preferably) on press.

There are, of course, volumes that can be written on this topic, but if you follow just the pointers given here, you will be well on your way to becoming a complete roadblock to any publications project you may undertake. It takes practice and discipline, but you can do it. And, as an added bonus, half of your production staff might just quit in the middle of the job.

—Jayne O. Sutton

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